The copperhead story

When I was 8 years old, I lived in a 2 story white house with blue shutters in a suburb near Washington, D.C.. We lived right next door to a park with a creek, a bike/jogging path, some gorgeous woods, and a small play area. One afternoon, I was walking down the path and saw my brother and his friend with pellet guns on rocks in the creek. Their heads darted to and fro looking for targets. Curious, I stepped onto a stone in the creek nearby and asked what they were hunting. My brother whirled to look at me, pointing the gun at my legs saying "don't move an inch." I heard a quick "pfft" sound of a pellet firing and striking something by my feet with a splash that followed. "That was a baby copperhead, now get out of here before you get bit."
I left the creek and lingered at the park nearby, waiting for them to finish so I could see their trophy kills.
After they had gone, I went to the creek and saw the prize...a full grown copperhead dead in the water. I looked at it for a few moments and gazed back at the jogging path. I pulled a stick off the ground nearby and fished out the corpse of the fallen serpent, dragging it to the jogging path. It took a few minutes to position it perfectly with the stick as I was still afraid to touch it even though it was no longer of this world. I hid behind a nearby stump and waited.....
As a jogger approached, I made a quiet hissing sound and saw the wide eyed victim of my prank bolt away from the snake. I laughed so hard my sides began to hurt. Looking back, I realize the cruelty of using fear as a joke with someone, but it was so damned funny at the time through the eyes of an 8 year old.
Now, I think about what does make us laugh and at whose expense. Sometimes, what seems funny is just someone else's pain. Laughter in delight is pure joy, but laughter at pain, misery, or fear just helps us perpetuate it.

Life goes on and on and on and on

In a strange turn of events, the moments of our lives can frequently be defined as 1) What just happened? 2) How do I deal with it? 3) What is about to happen next? So in the course of my childhood, I spent dwelling on number 1. Most of my teenage years seemed to linger between 1 and 2. I made the mistake of assuming I should focus on number 3 for many years of my adulthood. Now all that seems to matter is maintaining a constant state of number 2 so that number 1 and number 3 don't get in the way. Buddhism treats this idea of number 2 as a sense of "Nowness" which means living in the moments that come and adapting to them as readily as possible without dwelling on the moments passed or those ahead. Keeping this idea in the vein of hope, I think i can maintain sanity regardless of what events transpire.
Is it so horrendous that future plans vanish due to tragedy of fortune? We as a species have learned to adapt to a wide variety of disasters and achievements. So then, why worry that your phone bill keeps you from going to that really cool cabin in the woods? Why worry about what COULD happen in a relationship when making the relationship itself a significant part of your lives is more fun?

Hope

I have thought a great deal about this word lately: hope. What does it really apply to? Some things probably deserve the idea of hope more than others. Is it hope to wonder if you are gonna get to the fast-food drive thru just in time for that last serving of breakfast? That nice hot sausage and egg sandwich probably will be there regardless. I really believe hope is more of that dragging through the dirt, bleeding wounds of the soul, staggering in agonized steps looking to know you WILL see better days. In talking with someone who has lost her child shortly after birth, I realized how important hope really is. This person lost a very beautiful baby boy, but afterwords told me that they plan to have another child. THAT gaze ahead despite such a terrible loss is hope.
I know someone else whose mother is undergoing chemotherapy treatment for cancer. Despite how down her mother gets, regardless of how afraid she is for her mother, she holds to the devoted understanding that her mother needs the support of anyone who can reach out to her to keep the flames of hope burning. That support is another kind of hope that not only lies within those who face these challenges, but also is shared by those close to them. Hope isn't something a person should have by themselves, but that they should stand with as many other people around them who share the same vision and rise above their adversity together. This emotion is one of the qualities that separates the real people from those who fear loss so much, they already see themselves or whatever they cling to as lost.

Begin at the um, uh...starting line?

It's mid-afternoon on Friday and the weather outside is gorgeous. There is a slight breeze causing the leaves on the trees in the backyard to dance a little. The sky is clear and it's just warm enough to wear shorts without drowning in sweat. So why am I inside typing this mess? I sprained my ankle last week; due to car problems, I invested in a bicycle a day later and have been pushing myself to ride my bike 8.1 miles to school. My ankle has not been very forgiving. So, a little ibuprofen and blogging to ease the mind and body.
I have read a few different articles and blogs about optimism, pessimism, and inspiration lately. They really make me wonder exactly how optimistic I am. I felt a bit unmotivated even after completing 3 online quizzes this morning and I stumbled onto an article that made quite a lot of sense...I recommend you peruse it http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/how-to-feel-inspired-when-youve-lost-motivation.html.
I am a little worn out, because I have not ridden a bicycle for any great distance since I was 13. However, I am determined to make this body of mine cooperate with being healthy. I rode 10 miles last Sunday, 16.2 miles on Monday, and 16.2 miles on Thursday. At this rate, I could ride to Macon in a WEEK!
On a personal note, I begin graduate school in the fall. I know that the coursework will be 150% more difficult than any of my undergraduate work, but I realize that the rewards will be incalculable. Intimidated? A bit. Scared? A bit. Determined? HELL YEAH!This degree program reflects my passion to teach and my hopes to do so at the college level. If nothing else, it will take the talents I have and hone them into a professional capability.
Summer is just around the corner, and I am not looking forward to riding in the Georgia sun. Then again, heat means I will be forced to purge a lot of water from my system on a daily basis, which could be very cleansing.